The Coach I Needed When I Was 10: How Football Prepared Me for Life
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- 4 min read
I was always one of the smaller players on the field. That started in 1987 on my
Junior Pee Wee team.
It followed me through high school.
I didn’t have the size. I didn’t have the frame. I didn’t look like “the guy.”
But I learned early that size isn’t everything.
The First Standard I Ever Saw
When I was ten, one of my coaches was my friend's Dad, a Vietnam Veteran named Dain Parry — and he set a standard that never left me.
Tough. Disciplined. Fair.
We lined up every practice, stood at parade rest, responded as a disciplined team with "yes sir/no sir".
Old school.
He led every conditioning drill himself. Back then, conditioning meant long runs in full pads.
It demanded mental toughness. You learned to push through discomfort and finish what you started — lessons that stayed long after the season ended.
He didn’t talk about leadership.
He modeled it. He set the standard that I carried through high school and into the military.
Sometimes after practice, he’d line us up for what we later called—at least in the military—a “police call.” Shoulder to shoulder, we walked the field and picked up trash. It wasn’t optional.
It wasn’t glamorous. It was ownership and responsibility.
Years after I retired from the military, I saw him again and told him I still remembered that lesson—that he was the first person who ever showed me what a police call was. He laughed like it was nothing. But to me, it mattered. That was the last conversation we had. He passed away a few years later.
Even after that one season, I saw him for years—his son and I played together all the way through high school.
And the standard stayed.
Scout Team Taught Me How to Compete
As one of the smallest players on every youth team, I spent most practices on scout offense or defense.
Scout team became my proving ground. If I wanted to see the field, I had to earn it.
One practice, I remember making a hard tackle on someone much bigger than me. I heard Coach Parry yell from the sideline:
“Who made that tackle? Glaspy?!”
He said it laughing — surprised.
But he saw me.
That moment stuck.
Effort and controlled aggression gets noticed.
What I Could Control
I was always smaller.
But what set me apart — and what kept me a starting player in high school — were the things I could control:
I started running track my freshman year. That made the difference.
Track gave me enough speed at my size to compete. It forced me to develop mechanics, discipline, and confidence in open space.
It changed my game.
I also attended three straight years of intense week-long football camps at a local college campus — camps with NFL players and high-level coaching.
That’s where I learned from Raider legend Lester Hayes, who taught us the fundamentals of press coverage — techniques that are still relevant today. I learned how to understand leverage and how to move with purpose, not just effort.
My high school coaching staff refined it. By this time I had 4 solid seasons of youth football experience against some of the best teams in Southern California.
The lessons stayed with me.
I still hear their voices.
“That’s why we lift weights.”
“Football is all angles and leverage.”
“If they never score, we never lose.”
And the one that applied to everything:
“Finish what you start.”
Those weren’t slogans.
They were standards.
They were philosophy.
Football Prepared Me for Life
I went on to play eight years of youth and high school football in Southern California in a strong, disciplined program.
That culture shaped me long before the Army.
Long before Special Forces.Long before five combat deployments to Afghanistan.
People assume the military built my toughness.
The truth is — football built the foundation.
Structure. Accountability. Preparation.
Football prepared me for life.
Why I Coach Youth Football in Northern Virginia
Today, I’m a U.S. Army Special Forces Veteran, certified personal trainer, and mental performance coach.
But I’m also a youth and middle school football coach in Northern Virginia.
As the founder and head coach of Command Football Academy, I use football as a learning vehicle for life.
Because I remember being that kid.
The smaller one. The scout team kid. The one who had to control what he could control.
That’s who I coach for.
It’s Bigger Than the Season
Some kids bloom early.
Some don’t.
Some won’t look the part until they’re juniors or seniors in high school.
Development isn’t linear.
The lifelong lessons endure.
When a kid learns to control effort, skill, preparation, and mindset — they build something that lasts.
The helmet comes off one day.
Character stays.
Final Thought
I wasn’t the biggest.
I wasn’t the most naturally gifted.
But I learned how to prepare.
How to compete.
How to earn it.
And that’s what I teach now.
Football prepared me for life.
Now, I'm thankful for my coaches who guided and mentored me to this realization.
Now I use it to prepare the next generation.
About Me - Jay Glaspy
I’m a U.S. Army Special Forces Veteran and youth football coach who now leads with a different mission—developing young athletes here in Northern Virginia. As the founder of Command Football Academy, I help kids get faster, stronger, and more confident through effective coaching built for their age and experience level.
My coaching approach blends football fundamentals, speed development, and character-building. We train for football, but we’re really preparing for life—teaching discipline, leadership, resilience, and teamwork. Every athlete who trains with CFA becomes a better football player and a stronger, more confident young person—on and off the field. Connect here -> contact@commandfootballacademy.com
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